Andi Talbot
Before you start
lock the door
draw the blinds
close the curtains
and remember where everything is
as it is
as it was
as it must be when we’re done
Take photos of the order of clothes
to make sure all is as it should be
be certain to note
which hanger
and which way it’s hung
can’t be too careful
though
it’s not like she’d notice
See what’s on offer tonight
curse her for taking my favourite shade
find my solitary brush
and resign myself to making the best of
what’s been left behind
Another vital rule;
Always upstairs
never downstairs
and no matter what
no matter how cocky you get
never, ever
on the stairs
That would be one way to let her know
Wouldn’t it?
before she’s ready
and before I’m ready
the key turns
the door opens
her jaw opens
and I’m just lying there
looking absolutely stunning
but in need of severe medical attention
But above all else
before we begin
make sure wipes and remover
are available
can’t risk her catching me
with my eyes closed
and her pants down.